A Better Version Of Myself

Hijabi model wearing flowing EMMA scarf Starry Night inspired by Van gogh

6th year in my hijab.
Hijab builds me, it protects me.

Flash back, 6 years ago…

I was afraid of what my friends would say. I was afraid of what my whole family might think. I was terrified of not fitting in . But I kept thinking , who am I going to fear? People or Allah? And since then Allah gave me the strength to do this and it was a very smooth decision.


This year has been different for me. I found new interests and had the opportunity to express myself through my hijab.
Wearing the hijab makes me feel protected, respected, and unique. It puts my heart to ease knowing that I’m obeying the command of Allah and AT LEAST being a bit closer to Him.


In many ways, I’m lucky because despite what the vast majority of people seem to believe, I’m not brainwashed. I’ve grown up in a supportive family that values education and independent thinking. Hijab is my choice and will always be.

I haven’t experienced discrimination, but I know there are bouts of it where you’re wearing the hijab and people give you this look of “you don’t belong here”, and sometimes hijabis (sadly) aren’t allowed to enter some places. But think of it that way: either they don’t deserve to have us in this place, OR we shouldn’t be there anyway.

Other times people judge you because they think you were forced to wear it, or that your family made you wear it, because of the way it’s portrayed in the media. Although my mom wears the hijab, and she was kind of like a role model, she was doubtful . When I told her I want to wear it she was like, “Are you sure you want to do this?” I was fourteen, and I was aware of all of that. I felt different that I was wearing a headscarf, but growing old with hijab made me feel more confident because I am acting on my beliefs. Hijab encouraged me to become a better version of myself. And I can still be ambitious and driven while wearing my scarf. I discovered that it really doesn’t hold me back.

We need to be real about this: Is putting on hijab a challenge? I just finished telling you how empowered I am, but hell yeah. It’s a challenge every single day.
For every struggle we have in keeping the hijab on, we will be rewarded and that’s going to be worth it. Never forget that this world is short and it is a test. When we understand fully what we are up against, the challenge becomes acceptable and easier to overcome. And being in the company of strong women and supportive friends helps. A lot. Every year that passes my friends become more supportive than ever, they encourage me and make me love myself in hijab, and they always lift me up.

Sometimes being a hijabi may be difficult  especially when it comes to fashion. After all who doesn’t want to fit in and feel stylish and confident? We should surround ourselves with those who support us, just like other social media groups lately including women who share their experiences, expectations, and their outfits. They help each other out, there are many inspirations on social media for hijab today, many fashionistas who help other girls dress modestly and still be fashionable and confident, and many successful and interesting local brands such as EMMA that make hijab easier for us by creating pretty, modest, and statement pieces.

Don’t think of hijab as a barrier, hijab is never the problem, your brain is what stops you. You can still do whatever you want: train, work, and check off your bucket list IN your hijab. There are countless examples of hijabis who have succeeded in their fields and are the epitome of success. Hijab covers hairs not brains.

Being born and raised as a Muslim, I think that we all take advantage of that privilege by not being the best version of us possible. I do my prayers five times a day, fast during Ramadaan, and read Quran. But we have to value our religion, and think about the greatness of whom we do it for. Hijab has been a part of our religion that most of the girls see as an attire that they’ll wear when much older, like their mothers. And that’s their decision obviously, if they’re sure of their lifespan and that they’ll live until that day. But again, I believe that faith is in our hearts not on our heads.

Do not lose hope. Stay strong in what you are doing, especially if it is for the sake of Allah. Continue to perfect your modesty, learn to love it, and be proud to wear it. Believe and accept it with your heart, not only your mind.

Life is short. Jannah is forever. Don’t let dunya deceive you!

5 thoughts on “A Better Version Of Myself

  1. Nadine says:

    So inspiring and it encouraging me with hijab and gives me confidence thank you mariam you’re so beautiful ? and strong you gave me a self confidence, GOD BLESS YOU❤️❤️

  2. mariam says:

    i also wear the hijab and i admit it was a little scary at the beginning. i started wearing it when i was twelve, and ever since then hijab just felt like a part of me. i don’t even have to think about it anymore. thank you for this inspiring story. it gave me more confidence, and let me just say-mariam, you are so beautiful and strong masha’allah. ♥♥♥

  3. Fathima says:

    “Life is short. Jannah is forever. Don’t let dunya deceive you!”

    This has struck me today! Just the reminder needed. Thank you

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